East Coast

We're back! What a fun trip - full of adventure and some relaxation and a lot of walking. No, we didn't kill each other... not even close. We found out that we do enjoy each others' company and we actually do like each other! (like we didn't know this before). We loved, absolutely loved, Boston. What a great city. As we were driving home, we were sad we didn't just spend our entire vacation there. But New York City was an adventure in itself - where we went to a taping of the Late Show with David Letterman (which was really fun), and to "Wicked" on Broadway (which was amazing), and to the original Improv Comedy Club (which was interesting to say the least - funny, yes... vulgar, unfortunately yes... but funny) where some chick laughed like Janice from Friends the ENTIRE time. Wow. Here are some pictures to fill you in on the rest:

summer, the coast, and narcolepsy

I'm not sure what to write at the moment... but I know I need to force myself to write or else I'll just keep putting it off. So, what comes next will most likely be a bunch of ramblings.

I'm enjoying summer - it's a wonderful time... enjoying the outdoors - the sunshine and cool breeze... The evenings are beautiful. The festivals, the gatherings, the cookouts, the walks with Emma. And a summer with love makes it all so much better. I've dreamed of the day where I would be in love and happy - fantasizing what that would look like with scenes from movies dancing in my head. I've come to see that love isn't what you see in the movies... it's different, but somehow feels so much better. Things may not be perfect, and there may be ruts in the road, but walking through life with someone you can trust makes it all feel easier. I'm having so much fun and learning so much about myself... Nick has blessed my life.

And in five short days we will be on our way to the east coast! I'm so excited to see Boston and New York... to see my pregnant friend Trisha (I can't believe it's been a year Trish! It's a good thing you're moving closer to me so I can spoil that child of yours!)... to go to a Red Sox game... to see Wicked on Broadway (I can't believe we got tickets!)... to spend hours upon hours upon hours in a car with Nick (well, maybe not! just kidding!). This will definately be a good test of our relationship - I suppose that if we can survive this, we can get through pretty much anything.

On another note, I finished my first artist book, but couldn't take a picture of it because I don't have my camera back from the shop... but it turned out okay - not my best work, but I think I'm extremely critical of my own stuff. I did receive my next book, however, and it has me a little perplexed. The title of it is: "N is for Narcolepsy". Um... uh... what? I guess the girl who the book belongs to has narcolepsy so I guess that makes sense for her, but she didn't leave any instructions and I'm a little lost as to what to do with that. I have no frame of reference for narcolepsy... nothing comes to mind that would be worth contributing artistically. At the moment I've hit a wall... but I'll keep thinking and praying... if you have any ideas, let me know.

And that's all for the randomness for now... perhaps one of these days I'll get better at posting regularly. Ciao.

finally

sorry for the long delay on updating this thing... i've gotten so far off my goal of wanting to post daily... perhaps this post will inspire me to continue

i'm a part of this collaborative artist thing - there are nine of us in a tri-state area who are passing around artist books to each other once a month... each of us created a book with a specific theme and it will be passed through nine people's hands and blessed with nine people's creative interpretation of the theme and in nine month's time (hopefully) I will have a complete book of art on my topic. my book's theme is "grace"... an idea that i have been mulling over and contemplating on for the past two years. i'm very excited to see what people come up with, how they view grace and how they express that artistically.

today, i'm finally sitting down to finish the page in the first book i've received. the book's theme is "on the verge of becoming me". it has taken me a while to come up with ideas of what to do... i've been thinking about myself and who it is i am and what has brought me to this point... two specific things stuck out to me as i meditated on it: me as a little girl - carefree and smiling... not afraid to do or be anything, not afraid to be cute; and lilies - a flower that has become very symbolic in my life... it stems from a verse that has defined my sense of self from Song of Songs 2:2 - "like a lily among thorns, so is my darling among the maidens"... just this idea that God has created me as something so unique and beautiful that i stand out stunningly like a beautiful lily among dead thorns. i'm having so much fun taking those two ideas and interpreting them onto paper - using different mediums: oil pastels, paint, photos, ribbons, glass... it's so much fun!

as i finish a project, i will post pictures of what was created so you can join me in this process... and maybe it will even inspire you to try something - if not join a group like this, then to explore a new way of journaling.

ciao for now

megachurch & king of the hill

thoughts?

party like it's 1999

What a way to end the school year... we had a big bash - a Thrift Store Prom, and it was so much fun. Seeing everyone get all dressed up - some in traditial Prom-wear, some in vintage clothing, some in 80s monstrosities... dancing the night away to old school dance tunes. Sweaty and smelly and tired, but who cares? It was a fun time, and I wanted to share the evening with you with a few pictures - thanks to Brady Jones for the great photography...

Nick and I in our formal best... good looking couple aren't we?

Dance, Dance, Dance!

Two of the crazy-awesome-let's-go-all-night dancers - Nick and Steph.

Bon Jovi in disguise.

Strike a pose. Vogue. Vogue.

Who's taller? I think someone is a little self-conscious.

stretching

So, we have these beautiful tulips in our yard right now (not the ones in the picture, but red ones and I would have taken a picture of them, but alas, my camera is broken... sad day). I've been observing them over the past two days... yesterday morning and early afternoon it was really cloudy and dreary out and I noticed that the tulips were all closed tight and kind of bending over... like they wanted to just crawl up under a blanket and sleep through the dreariness (sounds exactly like what I wanted to do!). But the sun did come out in the late afternoon, and Emma and I sat outside for a while. I then saw that the tulips were standing straight up, and the petals were open and they looked so beautiful - like they were stretching as far as they could to get a look at the sun and absorb as much warmth as possible.

I feel like I've been in this dreary season for the past nine months or so - things have been changing with CSF - the people I was investing in were no longer a part of the ministry, and a ton of new students were coming in - kind of a transition time. We have been in this relationship building stage where we've just been getting to know the people who have been coming, and I'm not really very good at that so it's been harder for me. I haven't been very excited about things, and I realized today that it was because I'm not gifted in that area - I am much better at discipling and digging into people's lives once the initial relationship has been built and when I have earned the right to challenge them. So, I haven't been living in my full potential in ministry because of that... but I guess that's just the way ministry ebbs and flows sometimes. So, I've felt like those tulips when it was cloudy out - closed up and weighted down... but I'm beginning to see signs of the sun coming through the clouds - Mexico really helped solidify people within CSF and I'm starting to have really good conversations with people... and I can feel the excitement of looking toward next year and seeing all of the possibilities... seeing how people will start to grow.

It makes me think about farming - how farmers will plant a certain crop in a field several years in a row, but every fifth year or whatever they will need to not plant anything there - the field will need to have a rest in order for it to give it's best in crops later. Maybe I've just needed this year to rest a little bit... so I can be fully present in the ministry next year. I'm beginning to open up my petals and draw in the warmth.

so sorry

Here is my apology for not being very up-to-date with my blog, and for not coming up with anything interesting enough to blog about. And so, I will commence with an update of life-events...

It's Easter - Happy Easter! He is risen! I was able to spend the day with my roommate Betsy's family which was fun and relaxing... good food. I've been glad to think about the day and the resurrection of my Lord... how He died for me and conquered death and my sin... how He forgives me of sins I commit... and not only that, but forgets about them. I have a tendency to believe that he keeps a file with all of my sins written on them so that He can flip through them and remind me of them later... but not so. In Psalm 103:12 says, "as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." How much differently would I live if I truly believed this? Would I allow myself to accept and rejoice in His grace? Would I more easily be able to give grace to others? I hope I will be reminded of this over and over until it sinks in.

I've been enjoying spending time with Nick, getting to know him, getting to know myself. I'm amazed at how easy it is to be with him, to be open with him and vulnerable. I haven't had so much fun or have felt so happy for a long time. Just thinking about him makes me smile. I feel pretty lucky.

Other than that, ministry is going well... though I must admit that I am longing for summer: the sun on my skin, relaxed days of reading and being refreshed, dreaming and planning for the next school year, taking trips and having fun, sitting outside in the warm nights looking at stars... Just a few more weeks and it will be here!

Sorry it doesn't get any more exciting... I'll try harder next time...

Cynthia Sofia Petersen

Here she is, my beautiful niece, born April 3, 2006.

My mom trying to wake her up.

Big brother, Robert.

With my dad, look how tiny she is!

Not exactly sure what to do.

Uncle Mike (soon to be Grandpa Mike, hahahaha) and Aunt Jenny

My brother Rick, proud father.

Where the Sidewalk Ends...

Today, I bought the book Where The Sidewalk Ends by Shel Silverstein for my nephew, Robert. It was one of my favorite books growing up - we didn't own it, but I kept checking out over and over from the school library. Here's the title poem that inspires me:

Where The Sidewalk Ends

There is a place where the sidewalk ends
And before the street begins,
And there the grass grows soft and white,
And there the sun burns crimson bright,
And there the moon-bird rests from his flight
To cool in the peppermint wind.

Let us leave this place where the smoke blows black
And the dark street winds and bends.
Past the pits where the asphalt flowers grow
We shall walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And watch where the chalk-white arrows go
To the place where the sidewalk ends.

Yes we'll walk with a walk that is measured and slow,
And we'll go where the chalk-white arrows go,
For the children, they mark, and the children, they know
The place where the sidewalk ends.

I am entering territory - where the sidewalk ends... it has been surprising, exciting, scary, intriguing. Here's what happened. I met a guy... oh yes! He's a really great guy - Nick. And we started hanging out... we clicked instantly. And we realized we really liked hanging out with each other... so we decided to see where it would lead. And now I'm being blessed by him day after day - learning about myself, about him, about God, about this thing called life. I've never had so much fun... and I've never felt so comfortable before. It's crazy... but good. And so, we'll walk together... measured and slow... and follow the chalk-white arrows that God places before us... to the place where the sidewalk ends.

Beauty

By request of Peter Bradley, I am breaking my week long silence with a much needed post. Sorry for the lack of communication... life seems to be taking a lot of attention these days... but it's good stuff - stuff that swells my heart and of which I will write on later...

I've been reading the book To Own A Dragon by Donald Miller... I heart Donald Miller - the way he writes, his insights, his honesty. This book is about growing up without a father, and though I grew up with a wonderful father, it is helping me to see God in a different light and to gain a little understanding of those who did not. Here's a passage that struck me on Wednesday:

I wondered if all the relationships we have - relationsionships with our lover, our mother, our friends - are not unlike blurred photos of our relationship with God, as though they are foreshadowings in the sappy prologue of an eternal novel.

I wondered if sliding our arms around a woman's hips wasn't a kind of infantile introduction to the metaphysical. If I allow myself, I can see God holding up flashcards as I fall in love with a woman, cards that say, this is love, I am like this love, only better.

"See," God says, pointing at the flashcard with the word "love," then pointing at His own chest while I move down the woman's lips to her chin and her neck. "See," God says, putting down the flashcard with "love" and picking up the word "oneness." He says, "Get it? Do you see? It's all living metaphors. It's a hint of oneness - like My Trinity!"

I love this... this blurring the line between secular and spiritual. This knowledge that faith is so much more than sitting in a pew... it's all around us - God pursuing us in the little things. He's trying to get our attention with the everyday. How beautiful that is - to know that He is a God who desires so much more than a prayer or an hour in church on Sundays... to know that He is intimately involved in our lives - teaching, guiding, directing... loving. Beautiful.

Bono's Prayer Breakfast

If you haven't had a chance to see the footage from the prayer breakfast Bono spoke at last month... definately check it out here.

What Sarah Said

I've been mulling over this Death Cab For Cutie song these past few days... it's sad - but full of something more - something I can't quite put my finger on. It struck me with the line: love is watching someone die... and then I saw the video they have for it posted on their website and I was so moved by it - you can watch it here until March 26th. The words are written in French, so to get the full effect, here is the translation: On the mirror she writes "He loves me", On her hand she writes "A little?", On the wall she writes "Very Much!", On his arm is written "passionately", On her leg she carves "With madness", And she finishes the sentence on the mirror "not at all."

Here are the lyrics to the song:

"What Sarah Said"

And it came to me then that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time
As I stared at my shoes in the ICU that reeked of piss and 409
And I rationed my breathes as I said to myself that I'd already taken too much today
As each descending peak of the LCD took you a little farther away from me

Amongst the vending machines and year-old magazines in a place where we only say goodbye
It stung like a violent wind that our memories depend on a faulty camera in our minds
But I knew that you were a truth I would rather lose than to have never lain beside at all
And I looked around at all the eyes on the ground as the TV entertained itself

'Cause there's no comfort in the waiting room
Just nervous pacers bracing for bad news
And then the nurse comes round and everyone will lift their heads
But I'm thinking of what Sarah said that "Love is watching someone die"

So who's going to watch you die?..

slow snowy days

Check out that massive snowball! YES!

Getting ready to dominate! (Alright, we got annihilated by the boys, if truth be told)

Jed getting ready to strike... too bad his aim is horrible! HAHAHAHA!

So much snow! It's absolutely gorgeous, but torture on my car... it got stuck and it was frustrating. But, we got to go play in it... have a snowball fight. I haven't played like that in the snow for years. It made me feel like a little kid again. I've been thankful for the past two days - classes were cancelled... I am still in need of rest from the trip, but this has helped.

I'm home!

It's a weird feeling being at home... not having 47 other people around constantly. It's always a hard transition coming back from a trip like Mexico... not having the constant encouragement and company - which is weird for me to say since I am most definately an introvert. But this year our group was different - we were closer, more solidified. Deep friendships were formed, and I loved seeing the Lord in the midst of every person I talked to. It was a beautiful thing.

So, I'm home. And it's snowing buckets. It's beautiful outside - I want to go take a walk... I think I might if the wind stops blowing like it is. I'm glad for our students that they don't have school today. I secretly hope there is no school tomorrow... but that would mean that we would have no CSF which wouldn't be as much fun.

Here are a couple of things I learned on this trip (more thoughts to come later):

1. Don't put a digital camera in your back pocket... the LCD screen can get cracked. (grrrrrr....)
2. Have a sense of humor when you play riddle games with people... because you will inevitably end up looking like a giant goon in the process of figuring something out... "rice, rice, rice, I'm gonna buy some rice" indeed.
3. If you are going to spend a week shoveling "dirt" in Mexico (which really means a pile of rocks), get a massage when you get back - thanks to my friend Nicholas, I'm getting one tonight for a steal! Thanks Nick :).
4. Matt Wertz is an artist that you need to check out. (Thanks Jed for pointing him out to me, and for having great taste in music).

Thats all for now, folks. After I make myself sit down and process through things, I'll write more serious observations... and I'll post some pictures (though my camera did indeed break). Until then, I hope your day is unexpected.

muy stressed

Every year this week hits, and every year I am so surprised at how busy we are, and how stressed out I become. The countdown: T minus 3 days before we head to Mexico... ask me if I'm ready - go ahead, ask. I will answer with a resounding, "are you kidding me?!?!?!". Well, it's not that bad. We're actually ahead of schedule. But the last two days have been killers. But tomorrow, now tomorrow I have been selfish about... I want and need as much time off tomorrow as possible, or else I will be one crabby lady on Friday, and no one wants that. So, it's work really hard the rest of the time. This year I have decided to splurge when we get back and get a massage. Anyone know a good/cheaper place to go? I've only gotton one professional massage in my life, and it was heavenly. So, with thoughts of relaxation in my head, I continue working hard and getting through this trip... and hopefully after the 18th I'll be able to keep up on this blog! Hasta luego!

www.one.org

spinning dogs and dreams of a holiday

I think I may have seen the funniest thing ever the other day as I was driving to my eye appointment. In the car in front of me was a little Chihuahua in the back window. For close to 10 minutes I followed this car and watched the dog go around and around and around in circles... for 10 minutes! Constantly! Well, he would stop when the car was stopped, but once they started moving again, he'd start right back up... it was like he was creating his own amusement park ride!

What a beautiful day it was outside today! Emma and I went to the park and hung out for several hours, and the warmth made me long for summer - and all that is associated with it: sun, water, laughter, flowers, warm nights full of stars, camping, vacation. Vacation... thoughts of my vacation this summer have started flowing - ideas are forming... the East Coast and seeing friends is becoming a strong possibility... a road trip by myself, perhaps? We'll see...

I heart my iPod

Here is what has been playing most on my iPod lately:

Takk | Sigur Ros


A haunting album by this Icelandic band. I listen to it most while I'm reading in a busy place. The videos are inspiring as well (as I've posted about before).








Transatlanticism | Death Cab For Cutie


I have come to adore Death Cab For Cutie. They have some great tunes that get stuck in your head... some of my faves from this album: Title and Registration, and The Sound of Settling.







Plans | Death Cab For Cutie

The newest Death Cab album... becoming a quick favorite.










Clap Your Hands Say Yeah | Clap Your Hands Say Yeah


A new indie band - the album is fun and sounds raw which is refreshing. I get to see them live at the end of next month, as well as The Brunettes (also a fun band).







Life In Slow Motion | David Gray

This album I love to play when I'm in a contemplative mood... though for some reason my dog absolutely hates this album - seriously, she doesn't care about anything I listen to except for this... when she hear's David Gray's voice, she gets frightened and starts pacing... weird. But a great album besides that!






Illinoise | Sufjan Stevens


This has becoming, hands down, my favorite album of this past year... even above Coldplay and U2. It's fresh, fun, and full of talent. I recommend getting this album at once!







The Relevant Podcast | Relevant Magazine

I wait expectantly for this podcast every week - they talk about movies, music, and culture, and have great interviews with people like Don Miller and Derek Webb.

Paste Culture Club Podcast | Paste Magazine

If you like indie bands - you definately should listen to this podcast. They spotlight several up and coming independent bands and often play entire songs so you can get an idea if you'd like to hear more. They also talk about culture and movies - mostly focusing on grassroots projects. It's pretty sweet.

** A note on podcasts: you can subscribe to a podcast thru iTunes... if you don't have iTunes, I recommend it... you can download it for free here. To subscribe to a podcast, go to the Music Store in iTunes, find the podcast you'd like to get and click subscribe. It's free, which is the best part about it!

27 years

Amazing... 27 years old today and I still act like I'm 12.

In honor of this day, here are 27 things I love about life:
1. The love of my family.
2. The way my friends stick with me through thick and thin.
3. Grace, and the beauty of the Lord.
4. The way my dog gets so excited to see me when I come home, and then loves to simply lay at my feet.
5. Music - the way it inspires and moves me.
6. The privilege of impacting college students' lives through my job.
7. The blessing of working with Dan.
8. Being an advocate for those who are less fortunate.
9. Getting to travel the globe and learn about other cultures.
10. Taking walks with Emma.
11. Reading a good book and letting the story take me away.
12. Watching a beautiful movie and getting lost in the cinematography and lives of the people onscreen.
13. Knitting!
14. Dancing with all my might when no one else is around.
15. Going swing dancing... with some of the greatest guys around - Mark, Jeremy, Brian.
16. Catching up with old friends.
17. Meeting new ones.
18. Road trips!
19. Eating with chopsticks! :)
20. Getting REAL mail.
21. COFFEE!!! Especially Double Mex Mochas (no whip) from the Coffee House... mmm... that makes me smile just thinking about it.
22. Candles.
23. Thunderstorms.
24. Mountains!
25. Lilies ("Like a lily among thorns, so is my darling among the maidens." Song of Songs 2:2)
26. The smell of rain.
27. The ability to live and breath, to laugh and love, to cry and rejoice... the ability to worship the Giver of Life - to "bend and not break at the sight of Him"... what an abundant life I have led thus far.

life is surprising

I've had a two surprising things happen to me in the past few days - all because of this beautiful thing called the internet.

The first was that I reconnected with an old friend from high school - through myspace.com... what a crazy beast myspace is. I went to prom with Nathan my freshman year of high school... in fact we grew up together - went to the same grade school, I was constantly at his house since I was best friends with his sister growing up. But we had lost contact for about 10 years until I unexpectedly found his profile on myspace. And so, we have reconnected via e-mail... what a great surprise this is! Glad I found you again, Nathan!

The second - I had a great conversation with Colin via gmail's chat system... Trisha, you were right that gmail is the coolest thing ever. So, last night at 12:30 AM I sat on my couch and talked to Colin for over an hour while he sat at his desk in his office in Macleod Ganj, Inda at 12:00 in the afternoon. Amazing... half a world away. Thanks, Colin, for the late night chat - we'll have to do it again sometime!

And so, I enter this day wondering what else God has up His sleeve...